Why Write and “Get Real” Now?

Inspiration From A Post-It Note

This may be a shocker…but I don’t consider myself a “blogger.” Rather, I like to think I am an “owner.” Meaning, I OwnMy (own-my) messiness, trauma, excitement, fears, emotions, adventures, confusion (the list goes on and on and on) associated with navigating this new world called “widowhood.” I OWN it all today, tomorrow and really…for the rest of my life.

I am an official “outward owner.” Basically, I want (not without some major fear) to get it all out there and share with others (the inkiness and the beauty) with the hopes of serving others in a manner that is relatable; and therefore, less isolating.

For the past two years I have been writing and recording my observations, reflections, awkward situations, mistakes, achievements and massive areas of confusion. I am officially a “content hoarder.” So why did I decide to write, to document, to share, to finally clean out my content closet?!?

Well, my inspiration to write and to share came out of the blue in one of the most profound ways… a Post-It note.

“It’s Time To Write”

So one thing about Tylor is that he had a thing for Post-Its! He left Post-Its EVERYWHERE to remind him to do EVERYTHING. The other fun fact about Tylor (MBA, CFP kind-of-a-guy) is that he was an amazing writer. He was writing a book. In fact, his almost-finished manuscript is still sitting on his desk.

Writing was important to Tylor. Therefore, it was not surprising that he had a Post-It note reminding him to write.

About a month after Tylor died, I found this Post-It note that read, “It’s Time to Write.” It was a note to himself, but I couldn’t help but think it is meant for me.

When I found this note, I was dealing with the finality associated with Tylor’s death. The end of him, physically. The end of our marriage. The end of OUR dreams. Yet, somehow, this Post-It note also represented the “beginning” of something new for me… to go full-force into the world of writing, sharing and storytelling. Exploring the depths of my heart and experiences, and teasing out tips for others going through this type of tragedy called “loss.”

You Are Not Alone

Although I didn’t really know when I would make the depths of my young widowhood experiences “public” (major, huge, very real gasp, BTW), I knew I would know when the time was right…and that time is today, September 9, 2018. The beginning of Suicide Prevention Week.

By sharing my stories, observations, reflections and tips for “making it through,” my desire is that you:

  • Find hope
  • Embrace your own vulnerabilities
  • Know you are not alone
  • Learn something new
  • Think differently
  • Become more accepting of yourself and others
  • Talk with your friends about these hard, but super, painfully real topics
  • Listen more to others, not just with your ears, but with your heart
  • Give yourself the same grace, kindness and patience you offer to others

Most importantly, my desire is for OwnMy Today to cause uncontrollable laughter, gut-wrenching cries, major eye-rolling, feelings of relief that someone else gets it, and questioning “did she just go there?”

Yes, I did. And I am so incredibly happy you are going with me.